How to Teach Your Child Manners

There is nothing worse than a rude child except one that has no idea how rude he is. Parents are responsible for teaching their children manners and when parents fail; the child suffers in our society. Here’s how to teach your child manners.

Demonstrate Manners

From the time he is born, you should be demonstrating the way you want your child to behave all of the time. Make “please,” “thank you,” and “you’re welcome” natural parts of your child’s vocabulary. Watching you use the phrases is the most powerful motivation to use them himself.

Teach Manners All the Time

When it comes to manners, there is no time like the present. Go out of your way to be courteous and explain what you are doing to your child. This is especially effective when those around you are not particularity courteous as it often shames them into behaving a bit better. Encourage table manners every time you eat and use tissues to wipe noses and hands to cover coughs. The earlier you start and the more consistent you are, the faster your child will begin to demonstrate the kinds of manners you’d like.

Gently Correct

If manners become a battleground, your child will almost always win. You can’t force willing politeness, so stay cool when your child is struggling to remember his manners. Take him aside and remind him how he should behave in simple, non threatening terms. Then praise him every time you see him do it correctly. You might sound like a broken record, but he’s getting the message loud and clear.

(No Ratings Yet)
 Loading ...

How To Punish Bad Behavior

In today’s society, we as parents are limited on the methods or extent that we are allowed to punish our children. However, we are still responsible for our children’s behaviors. This can leave parents feeling extremely frustrated and often helpless. While not taking sides on issues that are better left to politicians, I am a strong believer that kids can learn from, and be punished for, negative behavior without the need to for physical punishment.

As a mother of 4 children I have faced almost every possible situation that would require me to punish one of my children. There have been times that they have tested my patience and self control.

I believe however, that they are as well behaved as they are in part because I have chosen to not use physical means of punishment. In fact, it is important to note that different behaviors warrant different punishments. For example: When my oldest daughter takes advantage of her cell phone privileges and calls her friends or accepts phone calls from her friends when she is suppose to be in bed, she loses her phone privileges. While if my youngest son were to run out in front of the street he would receive a verbal scolding and be put in time out.

The severity of punishment also depends on how many times an offense was committed.

The First Offense:

Let’s take the example of my daughter using her cell phone when she is not supposed to. On the first offense she will lose her phone for 1 day. Children are very intelligent and often explaining to them why they are not allowed to do something will prevent repeated offenses.

The Second Offense:

Kids are kids however, and if you are a parent you know that there are times when you simply cannot get through to your child on an adult level. In this example, increasing the duration of the original punishment will usually suffice. Removing cell phone privileges for 2 days or more can often “stress” the seriousness of your point of view. Be aware however, once you enter into this phase of the punishment, you are beginning a battle of wills. Children often “test” their parents and will not follow your rules simply as a way of contesting your authority. Most often they do not even realize why they are not obeying. This is yet another reason to avoid physical punishment if possible.

Regardless of the age of the child, removing an item or activity that they like for an extended period of time is punishment enough. My youngest child has special needs and for some children you will need to be especially patient.

NOTE: It is important to mention that during the second phase of punishment, consistency on your part is paramount. You MUST follow through with any warnings or threats that you have issued. This can be difficult, especially when it would be easier for you to “give in” to you child. For example: If your child has a birthday party coming up and you know that even if you tell your child that they may not attend because of something they have done, but you intend to let them go the whole time, you are not doing anyone, especially yourself, any good. If you tell your child that they cannot go to the birthday party, you need to have already decided that they are not going to go and expect them to beg, plead and cry when the day comes and stick to your guns.

The Third Offense:

The third offense is the most important and severe offense, requiring unique and inventive ways to punish your child. At this point, your previous methods of punishment have not worked and you need to think outside the box to find an effective way to impart the importance of being obeyed. All “testing” of the parent is done and this is the point where you put your foot down and take severe, but gentle, action.

Let’s refer back to the example of my daughter using her cell phone at the wrong time. At this point, I have expressed my expectations and demonstrated that not obeying my rules results in negative consequences for her. Having removed the cell phone for a few days at a time I have demonstrated that continuing the wrong behavior results in her losing the cell phone. For the third and FINAL offense I remove the cell phone permanently.  All privileges are revoked and the cell phone is cancelled or sold.

It is important to note that the third offense is the last offense. Your punishment should reinforce that concept, removing the ability for your child to repeat the offense.

In time, your child will learn that once they reach the second offense, they had better not “test” you any further. You will start to see that, while they will continue to challenge your authority through the first offense, your child will rarely repeat the behavior a second or third time.

Consistency:

Again, it is important to mention how important consistency and patience are. Just as you are training your child to follow the rules you set, you must also train yourself to follow through and remain calm. You should NEVER lose patience with a child. Stick to your rules and punishments and over time, your child will begin to comply with your rules without thinking about it.

(1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
 Loading ...

How To Keep From Spoiling a Child

Have you ever walked through a super market and come across a kid kicking and screaming in the middle of an isle with the parent unable to control their child? Most of us have seen this in one form or another and it is obvious that the child is completely spoiled and used to getting their own way.

But, what do you do if this is your child? First, let’s understand that spoiled behavior is a learned behavior and therefore it CAN be reversed. The difficult part is teaching yourself appropriate responses to bad behavior and then following through with consistent discipline.

• Avoid giving into your child so that you can avoid having to deal with bad behavior. When you give a kid what they want simply to keep them quiet and well behaved, you are telling them that you are willing to play by their rules.
• Don’t always put your child first. As children grow and begin to face the real world they will discover that the world does not revolve around them. Start this lesson early and make sure that they know that you are allowed to take time to yourself.
• Don’t constantly protect your child. Obviously this does not mean letting your child have free reign. It does however, mean that you should let your child fail sometimes. We all learn by doing and experience will teach your child much better than you ever can. As your child gets older, let the rope that separates your wants and their natural desire to explore, get longer.

In addition, parents who are well off financially have the tendency to give in to their children(s) every want. This leads to difficulty later on in life and can cause destructive and unwanted behavior. Decide what your child is allowed to have BEFORE you leave for the store or on your errands. Do not give in to the child’s desire for instant gratification.

It is important to give kids the tools they need to learn how to earn what they want. Being a single mother of 4 makes it difficult at times, but I continually have to remind my kids why we work for what we want and not everything is given to us. They have learned along the way that if they want something they don’t need and a special holiday or birthday is not in the near future, they will do what it takes to earn the money themselves.

It is very rewarding for the parents and the kids when they achieve their goals in this fashion. We live strongly by the NIFIL rule. (Nothing In Life Is Free). This will help kids out in the future when they don’t have us to lean on whenever something comes up.

(1 votes, average: 1.00 out of 5)
 Loading ...

How to Choose a Name for a Baby

Naming a baby is one of the most exciting parts of pregnancy and childbirth. The name you select will have a profound impact on your child’s life and should not be taken lightly. To choose from all of the baby names available, consider the following steps:

Clear the Air

Be open-minded when you settle down with your significant to dream about baby and his or her name. Women are not the only ones who have ideas from childhood about what their baby will be named. The first step in discussing names is to get dreams, preferences and expectations out in the open.

If you’ve always dreamed of naming your baby girl Samantha, but your significant other only likes creative and highly unusual names, you need to clear the air. Offer your own general opinions and the thoughts you’ve already had. Listen to his. Then put those on the back burner and work toward a compromise that suits both of you and the unborn child.

Family

Is there a tradition in your family that you would like to continue? If your husband is a junior, perhaps your son should be a junior. If girls are names after members of the family, you might prefer to follow the tradition.

Heritage

Examine your heritage. Are there specific names or customs that are especially meaningful and applicable to your baby? Is the due date on the pregnancy calendar symbolic in anyway?

Brainstorm

Use a baby naming website or book to browse through and brainstorm about possibilities. Each parent should make a list of top choices and then share the lists to look for similar or identical selections. If one partner has a strong opposition to a name, cross it off the list. Naming your child is about reaching a decision together, not forcing a name on both your spouse and your child.

The Short List

Whittle down names until you have a short list. Then practice the names. Do they sound right with your last name? Do the initials spell anything embarrassing? Yell them up the stairs – does it fit your home and lifestyle?

You then can keep a short list until delivery or pick the name that appeals the most to both parents. If you are stuck between two names, ask a trusted friend for her opinion or use one name as the middle name.

Flexibility

Finally, be prepared to change your mind. It is perfectly acceptable to change your mind during delivery or even the last few weeks of pregnancy. Sometimes babies need names like, “Hope” or “Joy” that have extra special meaning you would never have known about before delivery. And other times you just realize that your little boy looks more like an Aaron than a Zebidiah once you’ve gotten a good look at him. Be flexible – you’ll need it the rest of your parenting career.

(No Ratings Yet)
 Loading ...

How to Buy a Baby Stroller

A baby stroller is one of the most fundamental essentials of baby gear. Popular parenting advice will suggest you purchase a large travel system complete with coordinating infant seat, but that may not be what is best for you situation. If you’re ready to buy a baby stroller, consider the following:

Your Baby:

If you are having a singleton, or one baby, there are plenty of options for you in regards to stroller selection. But if you are having twins or this baby is closely following his older sibling, you must consider your need for a double stroller. For our purposes today, we will assume you are looking for a standard, one-baby stroller.

Your Location:

If you live in the city, your needs will be different than if you live in the country on rougher roads. Your location can make a difference in the style of stroller you buy. In suburban or rural areas, much of baby’s travel will be by car, but in the city, walking or public transportation is most common.

This means urban dwellers must consider the durability and portability of their stroller more so than suburban dwellers. If your stroller is traveling miles every day and bumping up and down stairs, it is most likely worth the extra cost to have a stroller that folds in a single swift motion to be throw in the back of a cab and can withstand more than a few bruises and bumps.

Your Uses:

There are four kinds of baby strollers that have varying uses. You should buy a stroller that suits as many of your needs as possible.

Prams – A pram or baby buggy is the oldest style of stroller. To ride in a pram, the baby lays flat on his back. These are most suitable for very young babies who are usually sleeping and not interested in seeing the world. They also tend to be expensive and are considered a luxury item as they are used for only a short period of time and their function can be handled by other, most practical varieties.

Travel Systems – The travel system is a life saver for many parents. The stroller usually has a means of snapping in an infant bucket car seat for convenience until your child is ready for the standard seat with its multiple reclining positions. The system has other available options such as cup holders, compartments, and a basket underneath for storage. Travel systems are bulky, however, and the more conveniences yours has, the larger it is – even when folded.

Umbrella Strollers – The simplest of strollers, umbrella strollers, collapse into the smallest storage option. This means they lose many of the perks of travel systems including multiple cup holders, storage compartments, and baskets. But many still do come with a tray for a baby stroller and attachable storage bags or cup holders. The primary drawback of umbrella stroller is that they do not accommodate infant car seats or even very young infants as they do not recline more than forty-five degrees.

Jogging Strollers – Finally, a jogging stroller has large rugged wheels and a special design to make it easy to handle one handed. It is the largest of the stroller options, but best for rural or bumpy roads. A jogging stroller can go places other strollers can’t but the one place it probably won’t go is into the trunk of your car as it is exceptionally large even when collapsed.

(No Ratings Yet)
 Loading ...

How to Deal with a Surprise Pregnancy

When you see an unexpected blue line or in our digital age, a glaring “Pregnant,” your world may grind to a halt. You’re pregnant. You didn’t plan it, and you’re not sure what to do about it. This is a high stress situation, but your first step is to stop worrying about that positive and let your initial emotions process. Then, when you’ve finished shaking, screaming, yelling, cheering and crying you’re ready to deal with your surprise pregnancy.

Assess Your Emotions

Your emotions will tell you a lot about what to do next with your pregnancy. If you listen to your body for a few days and try to understand the whirl of emotions you might get a sense of how much you actually want to be pregnant. Is there an underlying dread about becoming a parent or are you excited about the possibility? As hard as it is, leave your marital, financial and other situations out of the emotional mix right now. The question now is what do YOU want?

Assess Your Situation

Your next step is to assess your situation. This time leave emotion out of the mix while you look at your living conditions, your relationship and your means of support. There are almost no conditions that can’t be overcome if you’re ready to become a parent, but knowing what you have on your side and what you’re up against will help you clear the way. Look at everything with the eyes of a potential mother, not just a girl or woman.

Option A or Option B

At this point you will likely clue your significant other into the pregnancy and be sure to give him time to process the news. Remember how you felt and let him vent and express his emotions. The first few hours are no indication of how he’ll feel once the shock has worn off.

Then the two of you will have to make an important decision. Do you want to keep the baby. You likely already know the answer to this based on your emotional response and your situation. Your emotions should win our over situations, however since you can work to change your situation.

Hear your partner out, but trust in your own instincts. Your partner is an important part of this decision, but you will be responsible for the next nine months. Only you can create a healthy baby if you choose to continue the pregnancy. There is no need to discuss adoption or any other plan at this point except possible a sneaky marriage if you’re trying to hide the “surprise” factor.

Act on Your Decision

If you decided to abort the pregnancy, follow the requirements set forth in your state. Realize that there is a timeframe on your decision and laws may require you take certain steps before carrying out the procedure. If you decide to continue the pregnancy, arrange prenatal care immediately to get started on vitamins and a healthy diet to be sure your baby grows to be as healthy as possible.

Plan for Parenthood

Once you’ve started a pregnancy, you have eight months or so to prepare to become a parent. This might be enough time to train in a new career or finish a current program. It’s enough time to move to a new area or move back home to a better support system if your relationship doesn’t work out. Eight months is plenty of time to get married, get divorced or separate. You might even start a new relationship while pregnant.

It’s impossible to see into the future, obviously, but spend this eight months getting ready to become a parent. Even if you offer your baby in adoption, you’ll still need to understand the process of labor and delivery. You’ll also need to make arrangements for the future of your child.

If you’re keeping the baby, find a safe home for the two of you and a means of support. If you’re married this will be far easier than if you’re single, but there are many programs and support systems in place for single mothers. Regardless of marital status, find a support system through your family, a community center or religious center to help you through the process.

(2 votes, average: 4.00 out of 5)
 Loading ...

How to Decide How Many Kids to Have

Before you have your first child, it’s easy to plan your future family. Once the first child comes your plans might change. And if you’re completely enamored with your first and can’t image your life without another three or four angels, a second child might make you examine your feelings again. Kids are the absolute best reward for a lot of hard work, but only you can decide how many kids to have.

Your Temperament

Your temperament can make a huge impact on the number of children you have. Parents must be patient and able to deal with the daily stress of children making demands of their time and energy as well as the constant issues that will arise throughout the day. Granted this work is paid off grandly with hugs and kisses, but if hugs and kisses won’t keep your emotions in check on a very stressful day, fewer kids might be the answer.

Your Age

Your age obviously impacts your future family. If you have your first child at thirty-nine, you’re already limited on the number of children you can have. Many mothers over thirty-five have one or two children as thirty-five is considered a higher risk age for child bearing. On the other hand, if you have your first child very young, you may decide to have an only child to give you an opportunity to reclaim your own passions and pursuits as soon as possible.

Your Spouse

Your spouse will have a huge impact on the number of children you have. If he wants an only child and you want four, unless he is willing to be convinced a house full of children is really okay, you’re likely stuck at one.

Your Finances

Numbers matter, especially with children. Diapers and formula can add up to hundreds per month and clothes, shoes and food for older children are not cheap either. Every child you have will be expensive even without adding in college costs. Granted the first child will be the biggest budget buster. After that each child represents a few more diapers and another plate at the table.

Your Other Children

If you have a child with special needs, you may decide to have only one child so that you can devote your time and attention to his needs. Some parents have additional children to build a caring family, but every child requires a huge portion of your time and attention. You can’t short one child for the sake of another.

Your Marriage

If your marriage is solid and your partner is a partner in parenting and pregnancy, multiple children are natural additions to the family. But if your marriage is not quite this ideal or your spouse works long hours or isn’t as involved in parenting as you are, fewer children will be easier to manage.

Your Time

Time is a finite resource. There are only twenty-four hours in the day and you likely spend close to eight of them sleeping. The remaining sixteen hours are divided between everything you must do in a day as well as meaningful time with each member of your family. The fewer family members there are, the more individual time each is able to enjoy. If your time is already stretched due to the requirements of your career or your lifestyle, fewer children will allow you to devote more time and attention to each.

Your Instincts

Sometimes you just know you’re meant to be the mother of many children and you love the idea of a loud, noisy home. If your instincts are telling you to have many children and your spouse is willing, there is absolutely no reason to not indulge yourself. Fill up your home with racing children and bouncing babies. Each child brings so much magic to a home, a home filled with kids is a home brimming with love.

(2 votes, average: 3.50 out of 5)
 Loading ...

How to Have a Baby Girl

If you are not interested in genetic engineering or artificial insemination, there is no certain way of conceiving one gender versus the other. There are, however, various theories about how to increase your chances of a specific gender.

Selecting a Baby’s Gender

According to surveys more than 90% of expectant parents have a preference in regard to their unborn child’s gender. The reasons behind the preferences are varied, and when parents don’t get their wish, they adapt and are overjoyed to welcome any new baby to their home. But if you are ready for a baby girl and want to try to tip the scales, here’s how:

The Shettles Method

Doctor Shettles penned the most popular method designed to increase the chances of a girl. Before beginning the method, you must understand the rationale behind it. Women produce an egg every month during ovulation. The egg is always carrying an X chromosome. Two Xs make a girl and one X (the egg) plus one Y make a boy.

Men are responsible for the second X or Y. Each sperm is assigned one chromosome. When a male ejaculates, he sends 200-400 million sperm into the vagina that immediately begin searching for the released egg. Out of those millions, only one sperm gets the prize, and the chromosome of that one unites with the X of the egg, and the miracle has begun.

The Shettles method offers instruction on how to get more X-carrying sperm to the egg and beat out the Ys.

Conceiving a Girl

To actively work at conceiving a girl, you must know your cycle. Chart your cycle for a couple of months to see what day you begin your period and what day you are ovulating. You can do this using an ovulation kit or basal temperature. Then, once you know the day you will ovulate, begin having sex immediately following the end of your period. Have sex at least once a day until two or three days before ovulation. Then stop. (Sorry, guys.)

Y-carrying sperm swim faster than X-carrying sperm. The boy-makers also tend to die out more quickly. By stopping three days before ovulation, you are ensuring the only sperm left waiting around for the released egg are the longer-lasting, slow-swimming X-carriers. (Sperm can live up to 5-7 days inside a woman’s body.) When the remaining sperm meet up with the egg, it is far more likely an X sperm will get the honors.

Doctor Shettles also suggests having sex in the missionary position to deposit sperm as close to the entrance of the vagina as possible. He also suggests the woman not orgasm during sex (Sorry, girls.) An orgasm can make the vaginal environment alkaline which can kill off sperm more quickly preventing any pregnancy.

Easy Step By Step Instructions

• Know your cycle
• Use the Shettles Method to time your pregnancy
• Plan accordingly

Warnings, Advice, and Suggestions

A lot of people have been leaving some shocking comments. If you are able to conceive a child, love it regardless. Trying for a baby girl is one thing, being unhappy if you end up having a boy is pathetic. If you find yourself angry or unhappy at having a baby boy seek professional help right away!

Speak with a Professional about having a girl

Ask a Live Doctor about how you can Increase the chance to have a girl

(210 votes, average: 3.61 out of 5)
 Loading ...