How to Survive Your First Deployment as a Military Spouse

Two months into my relationship, we received a letter with the one word no military spouse or significant other ever wants to hear: Deployment. At first, I was devastated. I wondered if I was strong enough to be on my own from almost a year, everyday worrying about the safety and well being of my boyfriend. I wondered how I would survive and how would I make it through.

Communication With Your Partner

From the day you receive orders, to the day your loved one returns, it is imperative that you keep lines of communication open between you. Not everyone is as lucky as I was to be able to talk on the phone. Sometimes it will be months before you receive a phone call. Be honest about how you are feeling. Let them know that you miss them. If you are scared, tell them why. There is a lot of debate, especially amongst military wives whether it is better for the soldier to hear what they want to hear. It is true that a worried soldier on deployment is not as focused but it is also true that you are human and allowed to have feelings.

Stay Busy and Active

The easiest way to survive deployment is to stay busy and active. Time goes by faster and there is less time to miss them if you are engaged in activities. Holidays will pass, birthdays will come and go but the important thing to remember is that every day brings you closer and closer. Set small goals for yourself like organizing the closet, running a marathon, reading a book. Not only do these things keep your occupied, they are ways to stay connected with yourself instead of getting caught up in losing time with your loved one.

Care Packages Are a Great Help

SNACKS SNACKS SNACKS. Everything overseas comes in stale and just not the same as from home. Little reminders of home that don’t take up much room or can be used and disposed of are always welcome distractions and fun projects for the people at home. Small ways to pass the time are also handy on deployments. Decks of cards, Nerf balls and stationary are always easy and inexpensive to send.

Easy Step By Step Instructions For Surviving Your First Military Deployment

• Communicate. Even if phone calls aren’t allowed, write letters when you can just to keep your loved one informed of what is happening at home and how much they are missed.
• Stay busy. Despite the urge to stay in bed all day, get out and have some fun. Being around people and participating in activities will not only make time go by faster but will be a good investment in yourself.

Warnings, Advice, and Suggestions When Surviving Your First Deployment

Don’t panic if time goes by and you don’t get a phone call. Life on deployment in unpredictable and busy at times. Build a network of support. Turn to friends or family when you are feeling alone. Focus on yourself. Become the best version of yourself you can and when your loved one comes home, surprise them with how much you have grown.

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